This year has taught me so much about myself. As I sneak into my mid-30's and my tolerance for bullshit dwindles down below 5%. I must say I am ending this year - Happy, Scared, Blessed, and Peaceful. Yes, a weird depiction of emotion but the truth is - that's just life. With the murder of numerous unarmed black men, the presidential election and the racist temperature of society it becomes almost impossible to smile. But in those moments you must rely on faith (not religion). [Disclaimer: religion is what you are taught faith is what you believe] Sometimes it feels like a curse to be woke among the sleep and misinformed.
Numerous times I have contemplated deleting this blog, as I have done multiple times with varies sites I have launched and deleted. Unlike in the past it wasn't because I was bored with reporting celebrity gossip, news, and whatever else I felt... It was more so the fact that it was bigger things going on the news than which celebrity hooked up with the other, or who had a "break baby" while in a relationship. Cops were killing my brothers and sisters. To make matters even worse they were getting away with these crimes with no consequence to the action. Oh and did I mention most were even caught on camera.
Trump is my President and we still screaming Black Lives Matter while these celebrities we help reach their levels of success turn their backs on us and desert the community and using their platforms to swindle the masses.
This year I lost all respect for Lil Wayne -are we seriously the same age? There is no strain of weed that would allow his outburst on ABC's Nightline become acceptable. To make matters even worse he just did a very powerful verse on Solange's A Seat at the Table called "Mad" but as the year raps up I am putting his seat in the damn corner.
Don't let me get started with Kanye West... mental health issues aside he has been one of my biggest disappointments. His Jesus Walk has wondered off into the oblivious. If I can't recognize Kanye I can only imagine who he sees in the mirror.
But like a legend once said " I don't blame you new niggaz - I blame your old head". Someone clearly dropped the ball meanwhile the black community wait for the anticipated alley-oop.
I couldn't keep up with the other news because it truly didn't matter but one of my readers asked me "where you been? I missed reading your blog... your blog was a distractions from the things going on in the world." Up until that moment I realized I was just living to survive and keep my own sanity. I forgot about my readers. My bad. I'm back. We need a balance and despite how defeated I felt personally the urge to support, uplift, and stand behind my bothers and sisters grew so much greater. Meanwhile my hatred grew, my disappointment intensified. I knew I wasn't ready to write or post anything.
"It's spooky out here" in my Philly voice.
Moving into 2017, this blog will represent ME forever. I won't be so politically correct, I will share my truest emotions on varies topics. I will begin to share my own personal stories so please stay tuned, please share, please connect. I have so much say.
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